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sometimes i pee when i laugh!
2002-05-08
gawd, i'm such an awful bitch. today, i really lived up to it. see, during our break, i went to the toilet and when i came back, sabrina was talking to another girl who's a 'friend' of us. and when i wanted to join them, that girl told me to leave them alone for a minute because she needed to talk to sabrina. that pissed me off soooo much that my mood sunk from 100 to 0 in 0.2 seconds. and after that i spent the rest of the day being extremely moody and even telling my english teacher off for asking me to have an english dialog about booking a hotel room (interesting, huh?) with another girl in my class. i have to admit, it still annoys me and i still think it was unfair to send me away. it would be ok if that girl did it every once in a while because we all have our little secrets and stuff. but she does it every fucking day. and it's annoying. it's so childish. noone can have THAT many issues! but it wasn't fair of me to 'punish' sabrina for it. it wasn't her fault. i really shouldn't have treated her like that. i know that. but when i'm *really* angry, i sometimes fail to focus my anger on the right people. ok, i don't go out and punch strangers in the face. and usually, i also show enough respect to the authorities (e.g. teacher, boss) i mean, my english teacher really deserves to be yelled at and i don't regret it at all. but i'm sorry for my friends. they're usually SO in the way when i need to vent.
i'm just watching telly while writing this. and they're talking about what they have to change after what happened in erfurt two weeks ago. they're like 'we have to take the evil video games away from the kids. and we mustn't allow people to have guns' and bla. i mean, when's someone actually gonna say 'hey, what about paying more attention to our kids and listen to their problems and spend more time with them?'? sorry but if a kid is unhappy enough to go and blow off their teacher's head, they don't need a violent video game to get some ideas. and taking away their guns? well, fine, but then go and take away all the knives and glass bottles and hell knows what else, too. this is just silly.
but anyway, i don't want to have a long rant about that, now. it's pointless, anyway. and i'm way too happy. 74 days!!! yey!!! i got the confirmation, today. woohoo! so, it's only a few more steps away, really. i'm already making plans about what clothes to take with me and make-up and whatever.
eep. i have to visit my dad, tomorrow. and then, they'll ask me about my future, again. and i won't have any answers. but, of course, i'll talk like my future was brightest thing on earth. and they won't believe a single word. and i'll be all offended and hurt. and then, i'll be mad at myself because i know i've been lying and they're right. and then i'll be depressed and unhappy, again. it's really a shame. i mean, regardless of the fact that they're right...they're my parents...well, ok, at least he's my dad. aren't they supposed to make me feel better? hmph!
my cat is such a freak! today, he's gone all weird. more than usual, i mean. he runs through the flat and at random places sniffles on the carpet and throws himself to the floor and starts rolling around. always the same places, though. maybe someone's spilled something, there? but what would actually make him act like that? there! he's rolling again! gawd, he's freaking me out. i can't stop watching him. and what's worrying me the most: i feel the urge to flop down beside him and roll around, too. *laughs* HAHA! i just screamed and scared the hell outta him. i luv doing that. he always jumps almost to the ceiling and runs out of the door without checking if it's really dangerous for him. cats are just so dumb!
uhm...alright...i'll go to tease my sims again. haven't seen them for two days and as silly as it sounds...i miss them. hehe. my cute little slaves. :p
stay beautiful!
hehe, the simpons are funny. *laughs* ok, it's dorky to say that because that's the point.
liebling
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