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fuckiddy fuck

2002-01-04


i am officially pissed off now. seriously. consider yourself lucky that you're not here with me now.

yesterday my 'brother' (who isn't really my brother but i'll tell you about that some other time...maybe...if i can be arsed to mention that son of a bitch again) wanted to speed my comp up. which was great. i mean...i was promised a faster comp, a chance to finally get my webcam...shit like that. of course, that's brilliant. BUT he also deleted EVERYTHING i had on my comp. EVERYTHING! all my cebo stuff's GONE and it took me over a year to get it all. (if anyone has any not-so-popular pix...send them to me , please? i'm SERIOUS!) *sigh*

anyway...not only my cebo pix but also everything else is gone. several job appliance letters/adresses and shit. school stuff. mp3's. whatever. it's a shame.

don't get me wrong, i know that stuff like this can happen but what pisses me off is that it could have been saved but didn't because i wasn't told that it would be gone. soooo, of course, i didn't save anything and that was it. *explodes*

but at least i finally got my webcam. so i can show you my darling lola:


isn't she pritty? aww... yup, i know the quality's crap but that's what webcams are like and believe it or not...i WANTED it that way. my mom tried to convince me to save for a real digital camery...that fancyschmancy expensive stuff. but i wanted that low quality things to make awful pix of my socks, my pets, my underwear...whatever.

btw...i learned a few things today. (caution: some of them are pretty deep stuff so go away if you can't stand it).

1. cheap instant pasta stuff sucks. not only does it taste like the liquid you get when you let your worn socks lie in a pot full of water for 2 weeks but it also makes you feel sick and gives you a weird stinging pain in your stomach.

2. i have the best friends in the world. some of my friends have read one of my previous entries...the one when i was feeling really really down. and just today i noticed that they've sent me the most luffliest e-mails about it. aww... they're just so sweet. they told me how much they luv me and that i can talk to them about everything and all that sweet stuff. (i luv you, darlings!)

3. the crow is a fucking great film and brandon lee was yum. i went to get my own video rent card today (was using my mom's til now) and decided to give that film (well...1+2) a try. since i had read the book (the lazarus heart by poppy z. brite) lately and all. was soooo not like that book but i knew that before. i just missed the gay relationship and the whole s&m thing that gave a story a rather exciting and more logical twist but it's still a brilliant film.

4. it's a fact that always the people who have the hardest life anyway get additional kicks while they're lying on the ground already. i mean. engelchen and decemberstar (who are also diaryland users and my friends) have just let me know that almost exactly the same happened to their comps. and i mean...we all haven't been very lucky in the past few months. we out of all people would deserve some really nice treatment. but nooo. *sigh* i know i sound pathetic. i mean, after all many people have problem and noone deserves shit happening to them (tho i'm not sure about fred durst ). but hey, i am bitter at the moment. i have to react like that, you know. but my point is...i want something good to happen to me. something real good. you know...not the 'oh, this is nice' stuff. *sigh*

oh well...enuff babbling for tonite. i have like 5 open chats anyway and i can't really concentrate on this and i fear i might write more crap than usual. hehe.

stay beautiful!

liebling

xxx


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