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this was 2004

2004-12-31

since i am still pathetic like that, here's a little "end of the year"-summary...

5 good things about 2004:

• i went to london twice. once with annette, once with my mum.
• i got my first tattoo this year. on maja's birthday which make it feel less weird for me to remember the date.
• i drove down to munich to visit maja. we went to see slut together. great weekend. we also spent some more time together this year.
• i spent my last three months at school *ever*. i don't think anyone will ever manage to talk me into visiting another school ever again.
• i (re-)discovered a lot of bands and artists which really made me believe in music again, as i was about to lose my faith.

5 bad things about 2004:

• i broke and lost contact with some people i would have almost called "friends".
• maja and i were going to quite some trouble, i suppose.
• i didn't get to go to too many gigs this year which was partly due to no one coming and partly due to me being a lazy and self-conscious idiot.
• sex and the city ended here. which means no more new carrieful prettiness for me, anymore.
• the year ends with me feeling pretty lost, as i think i will be unemployed in less than a month's time.

yes, that's pretty much been my year. overall, i'd say it was a crap year because the good things aren't all that good and have downsides, too, and the bad things just suck. also, the total amount of bad things outweighs the one of the good things. and i didn't get much done, career-wise and just in general.

any resolutions? i guess not. i don't believe in them and i don't think i ever seriously made any. basically, i want 2005 to be better than this year. granted it can't be that much worse. i suppose the biggest thing i want to achieve is finding a job and move out. this is the big goal. and as we all know we have to make little stepstone goals for us to reach the big deal, eventually. and i suppose one of those will be to become more...professional. look-wise and just in general. i need to stop taking business things personal. and i need to finally stand up for whatever i want, let people know i want it, and go for it. it will be hard but i doubt it will work otherwise. i don't think it will be hard to figure out how to do it. i think it will be hard to stick to it and fight the voice that says "just fuck it and let it slip, it's not worth it. just go home and watch tv." because that's what's been holding me back from doing anything all my life.

i guess we'll see how far i'll get this time next year...

and until then...everyone go party your arse off and i'll see you hear tomorrow next year.




feeder - forget about tomorrow





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