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i'm aliiiiive! aaaahahahaaa!

2004-09-26


yes, i do feel bad for neglecting this diary for so long. i've had things to do, though.

admittedly, those "things" were mainly related to the sims. i seriously can't stop playing it. i start playing when i get home and i don't stop before i go to bed. with few interruptions. it's getting better now, though. today i even managed to go shopping and write the first appliance letter. and on monday, it goes straight off to ikea. yes, i'm applying for a job with ikea. i can't help it, it sounds damn great.

i really like myself today. i don't even know why. i just liked my clothes, my make-up...it scares me because this never happens. i can usually barely keep myself from scratching my own eyes out because i hate myself so much.
well, yeah, i like everything except for my back which is killing me today. i suppose spending even more time in front of my comp wasn't too healthy. so now my lower back hurts like a mofo. i guess i'll have to buy a better chair some time. (yes, i know i should actually get the fuck away from the comp and occupy myself with something sports-related!!! but getting a better chair is a start...and easier.)

and now for the gross part: i think i'm bleeding to death. no, actually i'm quite sure. see, i don't exactly get my period regularly. in fact, when i get twice a year, i call it often. yeah, i know, another thing i should probably take care of soon. but it doesn't really bother me. i used to be on the pill because of that but i stopped taking it when i was ill for a few months and couldn't keep anything inside anyway. and i never went to get it again, either. yeah, this also means i haven't seen a gynaecologist(sp?) in ages. because i *know* she'd tell me to get on the pill again and blah.
yeah, so, what i was saying is: my period came back to me on wednesday and hasn't stopped since. that's not too long, i know. but it also won't slow down. it just flows and flows and flows. by now, i am seriously thinking about putting a mattress into my panties in order to at least make it a couple of hours without changing. it's like all the babies-to-be(-not) are meeting up during the time i don't get my period and in the end, they'll start this huge wicked mass-suicide and just flood themselves out with loads of blood. it's disgusting and annoying and i just want it to a) stop or b) finally let me bleed to death now.

there you go...i've run out of things to write about. but at least it's an update. a short one but that will do.


manic street preachers - life becoming a landslide



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