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i want my mtv
2002-04-06
it's been an eventful day. nah, actually, that's not quite true. but i did go out. no going out in the sense of PARTAY but i left the house. yey. i went shopping (didn't you guess?). ok, it wasn't really shopping. my mom just needed some bday presents and didn't wanna go alone, so i joined her. she bought a designer coffee cup for her one colleague, a gift certificate for the other and some chocolates for her online-friend. (interesting, huh?) and then, i (once again) made her buy me some stuff. like, the tainted love single (cos there's a stabbing westward song on it o.O ) and baileys icecream and jelly bellies (yum). actually, i promised myself to lose weight. not to eat much candy anymore and stuff. but now, she bought me all this stuff and jelly bellies and bounty calapuno and stuff is just so yum. *whines* so, i promised myself just to take advantage of this last chance now and eat the candy i have and then only to eat an ickle bit of candy like once a week. and i'm also thinking of working out a little. but it must be something i can do @ home because i'm soooo not gonna humiliate myself in front of dozens of people. no-no!
stay beautiful!
ps: one last thing...i HATE all those peeps who covered 'like a prayer' now, cause glitterbug's version rawks SO MUCH MORE!!!! i didn't say that to shamelessly promote the band, now but go there and download the song, anyway. tee hee.
gawwd, the tainted love vid has just been on telly, again. i fucking LUV it. i love the scene in the whirlpool when he pushes her arms back. it's so damn sexy. and the girl's so pretty. aww... i wanna marry her. hehe. but i like the video itself, too. the idea of it. it's more or less taking the piss out of all those teenybopper party vids which is pretty cool.
i've seen another great video, lately. the song's called 'leave you nothing' and it's by mesh. probably, nobody will know them now, anyway but it doesn't matter. the song's quite good, too, but the video just blew me away. somehow the pictures are really powerful and never really fail to tell you exactly what kinda emotions the song's about and stuff. i can't exactly explain what happens in it. it's rather messy but good. the band's playing in a ruin (i think) and then there are pictures of people curling up in empty bathtubs and stuff and there are words written across the screen in this really pretty font and all. it's quite melancholic and i dig that.
i noticed that there aren't many bands/artists/songs around that really attract me, at the moment. the last time i really got a bit stressed about having to buy quite a lot of CDs was at the end of last year. and then, i bought like 6 or 7 albums at once and another 3 or so, later, and that was it. now, i only buy old albums here and there and hardly ever find anything new, i really like. dunno if that's good or bad. i kinda feel like i am moving in a circle cause somehow i just always move back and forth between 3 or 4 bands. placebo being in the center of it all, of course. hehe. actually, i'm a bit proud of having this one band i really *really* like and i'm a fan of and know a lot about and have most CDs of and stuff. there are many people aren't able to really care about one band and just hop back and forth and music biz and like this and that but never really care and i find that kind of being a music fan a little sad.
i, however, am taking it a little too far, sometimes, though. whenever there's nothing to do for me or i can't find other good bands, i completely freak out over placebo and start spending huge amounts of money on vids/pics/CDs of/by them. or just setting myself on auto-pilot til i see them live, again. as much as i LUV them, i should really try to get a grip of myself a little. i know, it's annoying the people around me and sometimes, it even annoys myself. especially, when i see like *really* fanatic people who even stalk the guys and stuff and i notice that, at some point, i am getting close to being like that, too. and i hate such people. and i know that's not me. i know i'm too mature for that. whenever someone asks for the guys' addresses or whatever, i'm the first person to tell them off and ask them if they can't show a little more respect. so far, i've never sunk that deep, myself, but i'm afraid it might go that far if i don't stop myself. i think, that's the real reason why i haven't gone to england, yet, to meet brian molko at some of his DJ nights. i kinda want to but i know i'd just do it to meet him and that appears a little sick to me. the guy's just trying to have a nice time and party a little and actually do it together with people who he either knows or who, at least, wanna party as much as him. and i'm not exactly the biggest party animal and from what i've heard the place doesn't appear to be the kinda place i'd go to if i went out to party. so it would all just be a huge lie. a stupid excuse to get to meet him. and that still seems pretty sick to me, sowwy.
yup yup, the shit i think about when being locked up in my pink barbie castle for too long. :p
want a bit more of that= here we go...
i've just seen the 'wherever you will go' video by the calling on telly and another of my puppy love dreams has been shattered. the singer (alex band was his name, i believe) isn't really as sexy as he seemed to be. *sob* he's still quite a luffly little lad but he has that nick carter (bsb) kinda look to his face/hairstyle and stuff. and i guess it would really annoy me if i watched him for a few minutes. so he's definitely not my next victim. *g* dunno, he seemed SO mature on the pix i'd seen before. it's not that i really spend that much time with thinking about which people in rock biz i should fancy (really, i don't) but with him it's so strange. is it really possible to hide someone's boy-ish feature that much? o.O other than that, the video's a bit dumb. i like the calling a lot and think the song's fab but the video...euw. i mean, they don't seriously want us to pity a chick who gets her boyfriend's name tattooed on her arm, right? maybe i pity her for being so entirely stupid but that's all. and as soon as they show her bf, she seems even dumber because he's the kinda guy 99% of all people look at and know that he's not faithful. apart from the fact that intelligent people never start a serious relationship with someone like that, they surely wouldn't expect to stay together with them forever. i won't even mention how TERRIBLY AND AWFULLY STUPID it is to get ANYONE'S name tattooed anywhere on your body, though. and she even got a tattoo the size of...australia on her arm!!! her arm!!! where everyone can see it as soon as she wears something sleeveless. *shakes head* and then, the bitch also goes and destroys dozens of CDs which would already be enough to make me unable to pity her. bah! oh, and in the end, she gets another tattoo made of the old one. but that one looks even uglier and, as impossible as it might seem, makes the whole thing rather worse. so, having that said, the whole video's rather pointless. because its only purpose is to make us pity that chick. and i just gave a million reasons why that just isn't possible. so there's nothing left to justify the existence of this video. well, maybe a sort of lecture. 'don't get the names of bf's/gf's tattooed on your arm or anywhere else on your body, kids' or 'don't even THINK about starting any kind of relationship with a creepy looking bastard with greasy hair' or 'if you have a really cool band which has recently released a brilliant album with supercool music, do yourself a favour and never release such an awful and pointless video that's bad enough to ruin any chance for you to gain any kind of success or fame for the next 2 years' yeah, must be something like that. in that case, of course, the calling have my full respect for being so brave and sacrificing themselves for such a good thing.
i'm getting more and more paranoid. after my comp's died on me so often, recently, i am now making back-up copies of my entries in word, each time. no, i've been doing that for ages. but now i started saving every 3 or 4 sentences and getting rather panicky when i haven't saved for 5 minutes or so. this isn't good, at all. i've always been a little paranoid to basically everything in this world. once, i even thought, pigeons really watch us and plan something. dunno what, though. but they always sit or walk around and watch the people in the streets. noone does that if they're not planning something. my mom also said it's a sign of paranoia that i think my cat's doing certain things to annoy me. but that's plainly, true. i mean, he's staring at me all the time, though, he knows that it freaks me out. i mean, i've been throwing paper balls and chocolat balls and pens at him just to make him stop. but he never does. 'but all cats do that' you're gonna say now. true, but why does he only ever look at ME? he never looks at my mom or my rabbit (well, only when he once again makes plans to eat him) unless my mom or someone else is gonna feed him. and he's only destroying MY things. and losing his fur around my stuff. and sleeping on my clothes. and pissing in front of my door. so, explain that. he IS planning to drive me insane. oh, and he can't stand it when i'm getting more attention than him. when my mom leaves the room, he often just stays. but as soon as i follow, he follows, too. just to make sure i'm not getting more attention. and when i am talking to my mom or my grandpa or doing hell knows what with them, he surely does something they find highly cute or whatever, so they'll turn to him. it's awful!
and while we're talking about my pets...my rabbit's getting weirder with every day. two days ago, i let him run around in the kitchen and the lounge. usually, he only gets to hop around on the sofas because there are so many cables and wires and the cat's there, too. but since i was cooking something, i thought that would be alright. he really seemed to like it. i had some of those paper pipes from toilet paper rolls spread around the place incase he needed something to play with or whatever. and he loved the things...rolled them around and stuff. and i really thought, he'd be SO tired when he got back into his cage cos he's not really used to being out for that long (about 2 hours) at once and never really ran around that much. but in fact, the little 'trip' seemed to make him completely high and as soon as i put him back into his cage, he wanted out again. and now he's constantly vandalising his cage trying to get out. and when he gets really frustrated, he just throws himself on the side and pretends to be dead. it doesn't bother me, anymore, cause i know his little tricks. but my mom completely freaks out, each time he does it. and then she feeds him and lets him out and pets him. hmm...though, i'm trying hard to fight it, i feel a sudden urge to try something... *throws herself to ground and waits for mom to care for her* hey, we all need a little love, every once in a while. hehe.
maja is a bitch! she's on her way to the usa, now. i want holidaaaaayyyys. *cries* ok, i have holidays, but i wanna travel. i wanna go to malta. *sob*
i thought of doing my private little movie nite, tomorrow. it sucks to watch films on your own but noone who lives close enough for me to invite them so doesn't share my taste and i don't wanna be stuck for hours watching silly and completely pointless horror films. i want to watch velvet goldmine, rocky horror picture show, detroit rock city (my 3 faves) and some other films. so, i guess i'm gonna be on my own, then. i don't even know if i'm gonna do it. i've been planing something like that for ages because i've found all my good old great videos back and i desperately wanna watch them again. but somehow, i never get around to. either, i'm too lazy to plug the vcr in or i end up watching cebo/manics stuff or i get interrupted. it's always the same. :(
OMG, i just realised it's 3.15am. o.O i've been writing this entry for nearly 2 hours now. it's weird. i'm not tired at all. i could write on for hours. or do something else. which is what i'm gonna do now because i simply can't think of anything else to ramble on about. there are no videos on mtv i could comment on. well, there is something but it's one of those videos i'm really indifferent about. i don't like it but there's nothing special to hate about it, either. (hmm...i wonder if that's worse than having a video that's hated by everyone...) oh well, that, howver, means that i'm gonna let you go now. you can still read other people's diaries :)
:::liebling:::
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