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i hate myself and i want to die
2002-09-04
ok, the title is overdoing it a little, now. but i'm really not feeling ok. the problem is that i have to go away for two days. it wouldn't be that bad because we're staying in a fancy hotel and my roommate is ok. but she's about the only one i know and like. we've spent the last three days in groups of 5-10 and my group was crap. i'm not gonna say it was full of bitches and assholes (tho i'd like to) because that's *so* immature and not fair. but we just didn't have anything in common and i have to admit i looked down on them a little. i mean, seriously, some of them were older than me and they had stupid barbie-talks. you know "daria"? you know her sister, quinn? and the beauty-club she's in? well, they were like that. "nails...blablabla...boys...blablabla...hair...blablabla...six-packs...blablabla...sex...blablabla" gawd! naturally, i just avoided socializing with them too much. the boys weren't any better, either. they were *kinda* ok but typical boys and two of them were annoying bigmouths.
there aren't really any other news. well, i went and met my dad and stepmom today. it was alright, tho it ended in the usual debates and blabla. the paradox thing is that he keeps telling me that he doesn't know what he could have done wrong and how he always listens and never puts pressure on me and is always willing to help...and five minutes later he does precisely all this. ah, whatever...
does anybody want to go on that stupid trip for me? you'll get to a five (or four, dunno) star hotel...with swimming pool. and you'll share the room with a nice girl. c'mon, i'll PAY you for it. please? *sob*
so, due to that, i know ONE person in total. therefore, i am not too keen on going away with 110 people. plus, i have to get up at 5am to catch the train at 6.20am because i have to be there at 7.15am and i need time to find the right place. i'm SO pissed. nah, actually i'm depressed and i think i'm gonna cry. it's a bit like going away in primary school when you're homesick after five minutes. :( *sigh*
puddle of mudd - come clean