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this is not fun
2005-01-03
forget everything what i said about the job not being so bad. it's getting worse and worse and worse. today i found out i'll actually have to pay back a part of this month's wage depending on when the final oral exam will be. the problem is...absolutely no one can give us a proper answer to the question whether we'll still have to work after the exam (which would make the whole payback thing illegal) or not. the other trainees at work today said we will. but annette called our "boss" who said we won't. but you can never trust her with things like that. she'll tell you something completely different tomorrow.
i also found out that i forgot about the goodbye party on the 31st. which sucks since i planned to go to munich on the 29th. and the 31st is also the day of the my chemical romance gig so i'm NOT gonna miss that. but since according to our boss the apprenticeship will be over as soon as we're told we passed the oral exam (which will be on the same day), this means i won't be a trainee with the company on the 31st. this also means they can't tell me what to do and where to be on that day. so they can fuck themselves and their shitty party crap.
i'm so fed up with everyone and everything. today, i told my boss at the shop that i want to go to the career service center tomorrow and he was all like "no, that would suck, you can't go tomorrow" and when i asked which day would be better, he actually told me to do it "outside of business hours". i went bonkers on him asking him whether he thought the center was open at night. luckily, for him, i just about managed to remember my manners, otherwise i would have simply yelled at him, screamed in his face and possibly also used violence. who the fuck does he think i am? i'm not even HIS employee. i'm pretty much no one's employee but i'm trying to become someone's employee which means i'm trying to fucking have a future. and he tries to keep me from doing so because...well, why? i still don't get it, sorry. and i refuse to accept any explanation because hey, life is unfair. i've learned that by now and i shall continue teaching it to other people if they force me to do so...
so yeah, i'm probably going there on wednesday since he allowed me to do it then (oooohhhh, thank you, big master of assholeness!). the thought of another day at that place makes me want to have a closer look at tonight's dinner again, though.
and to top it all, one of the job service sites i just visited had a link to the national lottery on the main site. just think about it.
AFI - silver and cold