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hey man, got some change for a poor unemployed girl?
2005-01-02
meh. i don't want to work tomorrow. i don't think the last few weeks will be as bad as i fear they could be but i just think that there are a million more important things for me to do than try to bring in money for a company that will not pay me any wages anymore this time next month. i still need to figure out where to go and who to talk to to get some support then. apparently, career service and job agencies don't seem to be too eager to help me with that, so i figured i should take my own actions. i just don't know where to start. but time is running out now and i don't want to be completely broke without any hope of seeing any money soon by the end of the month.
i bought the train tickets to visit maja today. on the one hand, i can't wait to get there because i'm really looking forward to meet her and get away from the crap here for a week. on the other hand, i think it might have been a shitty idea to spend 170� on train tickets and plan a week in munich when i don't even know whether i'll be able to afford anything while i'm there. damn me for wanting 1st class tickets. but i'm sick of letting everything depend on fucking finding a job or not. i've been waiting to make these plans for ages now and i've given career service enough chances to get back to me and nothing seems to be happening. if i hadn't bought the tickets now, they could make me pay twice as much for them in a few days, so this was definitely a good decision. i doubt i'll have a job by the beginning of february anyway. i started writing applications again but by now i'm adding that the earliest date for me to start working would the february 15. i chose a lame but possible excuse, so yeah...
oh well, my msn pals are kinda going bonkers on me, so i better try to handle the conversations...
though i don't really know whether it even makes sense to continue applying now. i want to get new photos taken soon. but at least i got copies of my new final report with the awesome new marks. for now i basically just need one goddamn GOOD reply. just one "yeah, come around for a personal talk". they don't even have to give me a job, yet. i just want to know that i (and my qualification) don't suck completely. so, basically i need a boost for my ego. though, the last rejection i got wasn't toooo bad. they said they had to reject me because my letter came in too late (well, maybe give a limit next time?!), so that tells me they would have considered it otherwise. it's sad how low one can sink out of desperation, isn't it?
jimmy eat world - sweetness